31st October 2012

Tonight is the 731st day, or 2 years, since Steven’s life-changing accident. In that time he has made constant, but exceedingly slow and difficult progress to regain an acceptable level of fitness and good health. From those early days at death’s door, through arduous treatments, to today’s improved mobility, it’s been an incredible journey for all of us. He remains totally determined to return as near as he can to normality. Where he is managing remarkably well, I am still finding it almost impossible to accept that the injustice of it all. I am still burning with anger and distress, despite knowing that I cannot change what’s happened. It certainly makes sense of the old adage to live life as best you can because you don’t know what’s going to happen next. All we can do is support Steven in every way that we can. He spends more and more time in his own house, cooking, cleaning, etc, and mostly enjoying his own company after so long having people around him 24/7. This is giving him limited independence, and adds to his general build-up of confidence. But that doesn’t stop us worrying about him. At times we think he’s coping with the situation far better than we are. Steven still has minor issues with his mind, in that he can get stressed and upset easily, and is frustrated that his Spanish to English translation isn’t as swift as it used to be. His speech whether Spanish or English, is improving in loudness and vocalisation, again due to his increased general confidence. One big downside is that Steven’s pain may never totally disappear due to the disrupted or broken nerve connections in his brain. In other words any pain he is experiencing “may” be coming from his brain, and not any particular part of his body, this is also very frustrating. Hopefully increased activity may help him to “forget” the pain. The hospital staff at San Jaime who have really made a difference to his current health, are pleased with his progress, and admire Steven’s conviction that one day he will be able to live life again. His daily physio’ treatment is being complimented by regular Tai Chi classes, which are helping his stature, his co-ordination and balance, and ultimately his confidence. Plans are being made to teach him to run, and enquiries are being made about him learning to drive in an adapted vehicle. When we see Steven now, walking as if with a sprained ankle or strained back, it’s difficult to realise how this has been accomplished when remembering the early days of coma, wheelchair, hoists, breathing and eating via tubes, cleaning of terrible open wounds, unimaginable pain, and the horrors of the mind. We thank all of you who have followed this story, and thank you for your continued support. Best regards Terry

19th October 2011

Hiya, a small update on Steven's progress. Physiotherapy is still ongoing, and the Doctor's are really pleased with the amount of work Steven is putting into his recovery. He is spending more and more time on a treadmill, both freestanding and holding on. We can see the difference it makes to his walking. He's still a little stiff and unsure of himself, but we do see small improvements. Occasionally he does walk with "attitude", that is, swinging his arms and hips, but it's short-lived. He can now look around while he's walking, making it more natural, and it's better than staring at the floor all the time. He has also started lessons in Tai Chi, organised by the local council. He's only been to 2 lessons, and he finds it very rewarding and informative. Tai Chi is helping him immensely with his confidence and relaxation, and that's only after 2 lessons. Unfortunately it brings back memories of his past life as a kick-boxer. But that makes him more determined to improve. He and we have had a very busy couple of weeks, what with physiotherapy and Tai Chi, he's also had an acupuncture session, and several dental treatments. The dental treatments are needed for the amount of neglect after the accident. We were unable to clean his teeth for several months. As well as a wisdom tooth removed, he has had 3 fillings and a very painful thorough clean, needs 6 more fillings, and he's had a brace fitted to his lower teeth, which will need adjusting every month for a year. As if he hasn't had enough pain to contend with. We maintain that the damaged wisdom tooth and the subsequent dental treatment is a direct result of the accident, and have informed his solicitor accordingly. Best regards Terry

6th September 2012

Hiya, Steven continues to make excellent progress. I recently took him to England for the occasion of his Aunty Linda's and Uncle John's 40th wedding anniversary. He took a long time to decide to make this trip, after being given many opportunities to may his choice. To do the trip there were many hurdles to overcome, the trip to the airport, the trek from check-in to aeroplane, the flight, the trip from the 'plane to the car park, then the journey from the airport to Hinckley. He coped with all this admirably, with help from the airport authorities and different car drivers,(he is still nervous in a car). Only two cousins knew of the arrangement, to everyone else it was going to be totally unexpected and a complete surprise. At Hinckley he met with his elder brother, and his new 2yr old nephew (for the first time), plus cousins and friends. At a later party he met with more cousins and Aunties and Uncles and friends. Of course there were tears all round, but after a few minutes all was fine. He stayed with his cousin to give him a little independance. We did all the usual things on a short trip to UK, we went shopping, went for an Indian meal, had other family get-togethers, and visited Grandparent's graves. The journey home after only 3 days was similar with the obstacles, but again he coped. He's overcome so much in the last 22months and this trip was a huge learning curve, and a complete success. It's given him more confidence to travel and be with different people. At one point he was standing at his Aunty's house, and stood totally relaxed with his hands in his pockets, without even realising what he was doing. Again a seemingly insignifcant step, but before, he's always said that when he stand he feels wooden and can't relax, this was totally different and brilliant. At physiotherapy, the staff are re-training him to walk properly. Previously he has been told to walk in a particular way by "kicking" his left leg forward, (remember he has to tell his body what to do), now he is being taught to raise his left knee more, and to walk slightly slower. It does make a difference. He's also been instructed in a new way of helping him talk, and that's by way of tapping a leg (or similar) at a speed corresponding to syllables, an old trick used by my late cousin who had a speech defect, to great effect. Steven has gained enough confidence to meet up with friends for a small beach party, making light of the fact that if he fell over it wouldn't hurt so bad on sand. They were all surprised as to his improvement. Another day whilst Steven was in town speaking to an old friend, I saw someone who I thought I recognised. I went to him, and in my poor Spanish confirmed who he was. I immediately called Steven, and this man put his hand to his head and dropped his face in disbelief. He, Ricardo, was one of Steven's nurses who looked after him in those first days after the accident, when Steven in his coma, was connected to all manner of tubes etc. The man immediately had "goosebumps" and couldn't believe the condition of Steven. Steven had no idea who he was until I told him, but after a long chat, and laughs, they parted with big hugs and handshakes, brilliant. best regards Terry

1st October 2012

Hiya, Today is the 700th day since Steven's accident. In the early days there was much to "write" here due to the treatments and ultimately the progress of Steven. We soon began to realise that this was going to be a long haul, and this has come true. Steven is improving but slowly. Physically he seems fine, it's just a matter of his brain teaching the left side of his body to copy the right side. His determination continues. Steven is being given different exercises to help him walk. He is spending more time on a treadmill, and is beginning to get some attitude to his walking, i.e. swinging his arms and hips, however he cannot do this for long, and can only get better. Further exercises will include walks outside the hospital on fairly rough and uneven ground. This is because Steven has made it his intention to attempt the pilgrimage walk of the Camino de Santiago. This is a long walk throughout Spain, and is in many separate stages, finishing at a Cathedral in Compostella de Santiago. Steven and his companions will attempt the final section, of about 7 daily stages, of about 20kms each. There is no target date, but the San Jaime hospital will do what they can to get him ready for this, and may in fact sponsor him to do this. Today Steven saw the "brain" doctor, for an assessment. He was happy with Steven's progress. The doctor confirmed that a lot of Steven's problems are caused by the damage between the main sections of his brain. Basically his emotional side is working faster than the movement side. This makes Steven seem quite abrupt in his speech and actions. This is very frustrating for him. Further, the same area of damage to his brain controls the amount of pain he's receiving. Although he is in constant pain down the whole of his left side, the pain is coming from the brain, not the body. This may not be corrected, however with increased mobility, the brain may 'forget' the pain. When the doctor asked why Steven doesn't show he's in pain, Steven replied that if he did he would just give in. best regards Terry

13th August 2012

Hiya Another mixed bag of good and bad news. Steven has been able to squat down from a standing position and return, without holding any support. Further, he was able to walk forward, do a 360deg' turn on his right foot and continue walking, without stopping and without support. Another day whilst waiting at a lift, a lot of people came out. Now normally Steven would stand still and let the people walk past him, but this day he immediately stepped sideways to his left. The move was automatic and not planned. These actions may seem small to some people, but to us and Steven it's massive. Amongst this we had another minor crisis when Steven felt really out of sorts, not eating, not sleeping, bad dreams, dry mouth, and irritable. It was Steven himself who suspected the cause was his current set of medication, and when I read the adverse reactions, they were nearly all there. So we/he stopped taking them and within two days he was back to a more natural state. The hospital however said that it was all in Steven's mind. This annoys Steven because he then thinks he's going crazy. Yet again we await a meeting to settle this. Whatever happens he is determined not to have any more pills and do his best to put up with any pain. One worrying feature that's reared it's head is that Steven is beginning to worry about his future, especially in relation to our health. We've had to convince Steven that this is normal within any family, because no-one knows what's going to happen tomorrow. This also came at a time when a friend of ours out here sadly passed away very unexpectedly. It's at these times when we can't make our mind up whether Steven is more intelligent, or as he says, he's aware of how precious life is and he is just more grown up. Best regards Terry

30th July 2012

Hiya Life for us is getting more manageable and easier. Whereas before we were busy, or had to be prepared to be busy, 24hrs a day, life is much simpler due to the fewer hospital appointments. Roughly our days start at 7.45am when I have to make sure Steven is awake. He has to be at the hospital for 9am, but we never know how long he'll be there, it can be anytime between 11am and 1pm, so there's little we can do in that time. Also whenever we see Steven we never know what mood he's going to be in. He has a few mental issues, in that he gets stressed and upset very easily, but he hasn't been really upset now for about a month or so. Also, we, nor he, knows what his pain level is going to be, and that depends on his sleep, his household chores, and what they do to him in physio'. Usually now, that's it, our afternoons and evenings are generally free, but we always have to be at close call for any problems. He's doing so well at looking after himself in his own house, cooking cleaning etc. But sometimes he may drop something, and we then have to convince him that we all drop things and it's not his brain damage. He's gradually growing up and becoming the young man he wants to be. It's been very strange watching him grow from babyhood again, difficult to believe but that's what it's been like. He's had crying sessions, tantrums, awkward teenager times. But now he's growing mentally, and the problem there is, that he knows how he used to be and it's upsetting him trying to be that young man again, and it may not happen, but my goodness you should see him try. His stay at the spa was a treat for himself. He took advantage of all the treatments available, full body showers, body and/or foot and/or head massage, a la carte food, and cost a bomb, but it was so much worth it. He will do it again but probably as a day treatment guest. We try to go out for meals with Steven to his favourite restaurants, this gets him used to going out and meeting/talking to different people. One particular night we went into town for a meal, as we did so he walked past many of his old haunts, and he "bumped" into over 20people who knew and worked with him. Their reactions to him were amazing, all knowing what had happened to him. It did give him a tremendous boost. But he does get stressed when there's too many people about, especially shopping. He has to be careful now that he doesn't use a walking stick, because when people see him they see a fit young man, walking slowly, with no obvious damage. He still has problems with change of direction and his balance. So we have to walk in a way that tries to protect him. The physio' team are really helping him with new exercises, especially for his left foot. He is now able to move his foot, slightly, in all directions, this making his walk much more natural. Still slow but improving. But this is beginning to make us wonder about the many opinions we've received from different doctors, whether to remove the foot, change tendons over, operate on the ankle to make it rigid. But with his determination and the physio' things are improving. He has had another session of acupuncture, this time 24 needles. He swears that it's making a difference to his pain level and mobility. He will have more sessions, and then hopefully he won't need many more. We are now in possession of all Steven's hospital records from immediately after the accident. Over 40pages of medical reports over a period of just a few days. The conclusion at that time was that his recovery was "improbable". Well he's proved them wrong. There are also over 2,500 x-rays and CAT scans showing incredible damage to his body. He and we have seen the breaks in his neck, ribs, hip joint, pelvis, and leg, the bleeding in his liver, and the bleeding in the brain. The damage is frightening to see, particularly the pelvis and brain. But what these records do show, is that, even though the outcome was doubtful, the hospital staff did everything in their power to "fix" him, and obviously we will be forever grateful. best regards Terry

14th July 2012

Hiya, Monday evening Steven had a revision of his problems and the treatment being given especially in relation to the amount of pain he is in. After this he had an acupuncture session, where 20 needles were put on his neck, back, wrists, elbow, forehead, shins and feet. He only painfully felt one pin in his back, and one near his toes, apart from those he never felt a thing. Almost immediately he began to feel different. He was able to move his head side to side for the first time for months, and other pains were reduced. His frowning stopped and he looked fresher in his face. Overall he was pleased after the 2 hour session, at the end of which the needles just began to fall out on their own, weird. He has another session in two weeks time. This morning he was fine, having had an excellent sleep. It was obviously worth trying, and we will continue to do what we can to investigate any means of treatment. Steven has had a good relatively pain free week, however this has allowed the physio' team to put him through extra exercises which creates their own pain, he can't win!!. His whole demeanour has changed this week, a combination of good food, the acupuncture, and the physio'. The physio' psychiatry team are also talking to him, and this has brought on new problems. When this hospital initially saw Steven's doctor's reports, they said that if they hadn't seen Steven and just relied on the reports they wouldn't have considered treating him. I think that this has brought more challenges to the hospital staff them having never been able to speak to someone who has had such catastrophic brain injuries and survived. Steven has been able to explain what he felt and experienced whilst in his coma and in PTA. This is confusing the staff and are taking literally everything that Steven says, or not understanding him at all. There's no doubt that Steven has become more intelligent, whether that's as a result of the injury, or being around intelligent people (I don't mean us I mean doctors etc in team meetings) I don't know. Steven speaks eloquently and beautifully about his experiences. This week he tried to explain that even now he still feels "wooden". It's as though his body doesn't belong to him. He knows what he has to do but has to tell his body what to do. The hospital just cannot understand this and it's causing confusion and stress for Steven. Steven explains it in this manner. If for example he needs to open a bottle he knows that the procedure is to hold the bottle with one hand, and the bottle top with the other, he then has to twist the bottle and top in different directions, using the correct amount of strength to do so. To everyone else this is simple and is as easy as going from A to B. However, Steven's brain has to tell the body to go to C then D then E then F then G before reaching B. Everything he does is the same, he knows what to do but everything is much slower due to the route that the brain takes to get the job done. This applies to speaking, walking, everything. This is particularly frustrating to Steven when it comes to speaking. Before the accident he could, for example, listen to Spanish music or speech and instantly translate that to English. Now, he can still translate, but it's not immediate. Also when speaking Spanish he no longer has the Spanish accent, he speaks Spanish as an English person. It's the same with the English language. In Spanish, every letter in each word is pronounced, you cannot do this with the English language because there are so many English words with unneccesary silent letters, and this is now confusing Steven. To us it's as though Steven is reliving a childhood, and is learning and growing in every respect, but whereas a child has never done these things before, he has, and that's the confusion. Steven has explained to the staff that whilst in his coma he saw "God". Steven is not religious in any way, but when in his coma, he saw a man with a long white beard and long white hair approach him and be very close to him. In not a religious way at all he could only think that he saw the popular image of God. What happened was, during the night of 6th January, one of the Three Kings in popular Spanish culture visited the patients at the hospital in way that Father Christmas visits English hospitals. One of these Three Kings is black, and Steven gave the staff that King's name by mistake, which the staff immediately thought that Steven's God was black. This created so much confusion to the point of upsetting Steven. He was able to explain it correctly, but we fear now that incorrect facts have been written about him in his hospital file, which I must address. It's frightening to think what people in comas could be experiencing. Steven was able to see, hear, and think, but was unable to do anything about what he was experiencing. Steven is living proof that family and friends, and even hospital staff must be aware that coma patients are indeed very much aware of their surroundings. This weekend Steven and us have confident enough to allow Steven to have 3 days at a local Hotel and Spa. Hopefully this will give him extra confidence. He will be in his own room with a different view, eating top quality food, and having all manner of treatments including jacuzzi, hot and cold baths, and massages, all in a tranquil atmosphere. He's only a few miles away and we can be there in 15 minutes if he needs us. best regards Terry