A busy week for all of us. Monday Pauline and I returned to Torrevieja in the hope of sorting out Steven’s pension after being passed from office to office for several weeks. The lady at the Social Security office was very helpful. Apparently because Steven is in hospital receiving a bed and food he’s not entitled to a pension. As soon as he is discharged from hospital he will be assessed as to his capabilities, and any entitlement to a pension will start then. This all makes sense, but it would have been much better if one of the previous 7 people had told us that, to save us all the form filling, telephone calls, and travel involved. When this was done Pauline and I took a well earned break in Benidorm, half board in a hotel, our first break for over 6 months. A good holiday, not that playing bingo did us any favours with other people on our table winning, and us going home with empty pockets. No cleaning, no cooking, no washing up for 3 days, wonderful. We returned to learn that Steven had had an operation on Tuesday to remove his feeding tube. We have been waiting for this for several weeks, this will make Steven feel better, not having an usused plastic tube hanging from his stomach. The operation wasn’t a problem, but Steven said that the anaesthetic drip in his arm was painful. Thursday evening, by prior arrangement I collected Andy from Alzira. Andy is walking from Rome to Ronda to raise funds and awareness of disadvantaged children in Andalucia. He visited Steven, before going to our rented house for a meal. We returned for time with Steven. It’s the likes of Steven which is the focus of his charity, and Andy was pleased to see the recovery in Steven. It was during this conversation that Steven described how he really felt. He said that he knows he’s getting better, and he knows that his intelligence and memory seem to be okay, but he feels that his body doesn’t belong to him. A very strange thing to say, but makes sense, if his brain has been re-booted. He has to mentally tell every part of his body what to do, learning everything all over again as would a child. Andy left Friday morning to continue his walk south. Friday morning Pauline and I were summoned to the hospital during Steven’s physio’ session, to be shown how Steven was to use a walking frame. Similar to a zimmer frame, but smaller. First I had to learn how to put on a support “boot” to Steven’s left foot, with a complicated arrangement of Velcro straps. Then Steven proceeded to walk the length of the waiting room and back, about 50yds, it was good to see this. Steven has been practicing in the physio’, and was now being allowed to walk with us. That evening we took the frame to Steven’s room in order that he could walk whenever he wanted, which he did several times over the weekend. He walked around the hospital floor, a total of about 100yds each time. He takes his time, it makes his muscles ache, but he’s determined to do this. He continues to dress, undress, and wash himself, and when his feeding tube “hole” has healed, he’ll be taught to shower himself. However although his body appears to be healing well, we’re having concerns about his head. There’s no doubt he has retained or even bettered his intelligence, but he still seems to have the mentality of a child. He seems to treat us, his carers, as children, none of us can do anything correct. What is done for him one way one day, sometimes has to be done a different way another day. He’s very abrupt to the point of rudeness when he talks to anyone, including us. If he doesn’t get his own way, or sees us apparently objecting to what he says, even just by a simple facial expression, he gets upset, and sometimes angry. Saturday morning was typical of this, when Steven was very abrupt answering Pauline’s questions about toilet, clothes, and food. All this started because earlier I had put his socks on wrong, even though I hadn’t finished doing so. We were told a long time ago, that when things happen like this, we have a choice, do what he wants, or ignore him. We feel it’s best to ignore him when he’s in such moods. Steven was even told by a nurse that he seemed angry when he spoke, and asked us if that was true, we told him it was. Steven has every right in the world to feel angry at what’s happened to him, but we cannot allow ourselves to also become ill with worry. By Sunday evening Steven’s attitude had changed for the better, and we enjoyed an evening watching a dvd and eating left over Easter eggs.
Best regards
Terry
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