It’s now been 100 days since that terrible ‘phone call. We were at home having breakfast when the call came from the hospital. Steven has had a few motorcycle accidents, and we assumed that this was yet another one, and thinking “What’s he done now?”. Little did we know! We were directed to Intensive Care, and even then we were in denial that this was just precautionary. Until the Doctor spoke to us! Our world fell apart. The injuries were so severe that Steven’s prognosis was very poor, and there were 3 possible outcomes, 2 of which were unthinkable.
The circumstances of Steven’s accident were equally upsetting. He was a passenger in a taxi that he could ill-afford, but the sensible person within him retained the money after a night out. The taxi was struck violently and at high speed by a car passing through a red light, before the offending driver ran away, leaving behind his forged passport, and a mobile ‘phone obtained by fraudulent means. The Police are now searching for possibly a member of a criminal gang, at least they know who he is from fingerprints and DNA.
Steven was lying motionless in a bed with all manner of tubes and wires protruding from him, yet he looked asleep. Once the seriousness of the situation had set in, we had to inform friends and family. One son, Mark, was in Mexico, and as much as we wanted him with us, he was left at the mercy of airline schedules and cancellations. The other son, Paul, had been estranged for several years, what an awful way to get back together, all differences set aside. Since then Paul has been a great help in caring for Steven, giving up his own life in UK.
From the very outset we had enormous invaluable help from Javi Seva, young man, a friend for over 20 years, who’d known Steven since he was about 5yrs old, when Javi himself was just a teenager. Javi helped us with Doctors, Police, and other translations. Thank you Javi.
The following day we received yet another call from the hospital telling us to go there immediately. We never spoke a word, our minds working overtime. The reason for the visit was for the immediate transfer of Steven to a special unit at Benidorm. Here were conducted many tests to determine the level of damage to Steven’s brain. It was extensive. Steven’s head, though not visibly damaged, had been shaken violently, damaging many neurons, essential for the working of brain and body. The prognosis remained very poor.
After a week he was returned to Torrevieja, to the Intensive Care ward, where he remained for a few days until his condition was stabilised, and he was put into his own room under constant care.
The medical staff at both hospitals, some of whom knew Steven from school and his various work placements, were nothing short of wonderful, and we thank them deeply.
For several weeks Steven fought the ravages of minor infections and setbacks, almost as if different sections of the brain were repairing themselves. His heart and breathing rate fluctuated wildly from very low to dangerously high. His weight loss was incredible, despite food supplements.
At this point we’d like to thank Charli and her staff at Legends Bar, Flamenca Beach. Steven only worked for them for just 2 weeks, yet Charli and her staff continued to visit Steven at both hospitals, for 6 weeks. They have continued to enquire as to Steven’s health.
After several weeks, Steven was transferred to a specialist hospital at Alzira near Valencia, where he is now.
Here we would like to thank Gordon for his efforts in trying to find a foster home for Steven’s dog, and to Paul for having this dog for a few days. This action prevented the dog from being put down.
The difference here at Alzira has been remarkable. With the correct medicines and therapy, every day we see minor improvements, whether it’s a foot or hand movement, or even a tear. Steven is now talking, after initially just making noises. He has retained both languages, when there was a great fear that he would lose one of them. He can alternate between the languages when necessary. He can spell in text-speak. He is beginning to have assisted “walks”. His food intake has been increased resulting in a slight increase in weight, and we allow him to have some food on a spoon for him to taste. Even doing this, it’s a victory for us to see him just lick his lips, and wipe his mouth with a serviette. He can move his right arm almost normally, whereas he still has a lot of problems with his left arm, caused mainly by calcification of the joints due to immobility. He has a lot of pain in his hips and left leg, but x-rays show no damage, so it’s muscle or tendon pain, probably from physiotherapy work. His injuries to his feet are healing well, but these and the injury to his left leg will require skin grafting in the future. He has shuffled from chair to bed with help, proving he has the ability to walk, and all we hope now is for his strength to return to his legs. His hearing seems to have improved because any noise irritates him. He says he doesn’t want to learn to drive, he is frightened of cars. Steven has periods of time when he can be very thoughtful, and at other times, very blunt and forward. He doesn’t mean what he says, but it can be hurtful. He has pushed us all away at times. But the nurses say that this is normal, and that sometimes patients can be very violent, even to the nurses. At one point he was so agitated he broke 4 welded bolts on his bed. It’s as though Steven has two sections of his brain fighting themselves, one as the intelligent adult, the other a vulnerable baby, and we never know which Steven we’re going to have. Steven has had a rough few days when he stated he wanted to die, again we were told this is normal, but it’s not normal to us, and was extremely upsetting. He no longer feels this way, but occasionally he does get depressed and asks himself how can he go on. His sleeping pattern is almost non-existant, awake during most of the night due to nightmares, and dozing during the day. He cannot move himself at all, so we have to move him from side to side in bed, being careful not to hurt his arm and leg. He has no muscle on his backside so he’s uncomfortable in the wheelchair, but change of posture is important, as is the chance of fresh mountain air outside. All we can do is encourage and comfort. We have no way of knowing what is going on in Steven’s mind. He often says he’s confused. He says we don’t know what he’s going through.
I asked a dear cousin involved in a serious accident about 25yrs ago for her thoughts on Steven’s situation. The next paragraph is her informative reply.
“Hi Terry & Pauline, I have read Stevens diary. Yes I can relate to some of the Hell that Steven is going through. I had a swelling of the brain, nothing as horrific as Steven, but never the less hell. The things I saw when I was asleep were a complete hell, they were real, not like a nightmare. You are there, these horrible things are happening to you, there was also the noise I can’t explain what it was like, I pushed tissue into my ear drums to try to deaden the noise, I could remember doing that, they managed to get it out ok. I can’t emphasise the reality of all this, my horrors, they had nothing to do with the accident. I could not remember that, even to this day I cannot remember the actual head on collision (I can only remember before the accident and after.) My bad dreams were coming from my brain playing tricks on me related to trauma and drugs. I didn’t want to go to sleep (I didn’t want to go there any more.) I too was making a right nuisance of myself, shouting, demanding that they take me home, I thought that the nurses and doctors were all in on it, they were trying to send me mad, I thought they didn’t like me. Like Steven I too wanted to die, probably not for the same reason, but never the less I did. But I decided I was going to live, I couldn’t leave my children. It was the biggest fight of my life, but I made it. Steven has to want to live, to beat it, (get rid of the demons.) I know he is frightened who wouldn’t be. I hope some of this has helped. I think you are all doing fantastic in helping Steven to his recovery.”
We can indeed relate to the above, and this has been most helpful.
We have seen all manner of improvements, from opening his eyes, moving a leg, or holding his head high. He is no longer violent, nor visibly frightened. He is much calmer to the point of being asleep at inappropriate times, probably the side effects of some drugs. But it is difficult for the Doctors to adjust the medication to suit all his problems. We just have to wait for the drugs to take effect, and do their job. He is gradually being weaned off some of the drugs.
We would also like to say thank you to Eddie, Nick, and Phil for their work in setting up the Steven’s Diary website, and as a result of that, we thank all of you for your help, and messages of support.
We try to forget the backward steps and try every day to feel a little more positive of a wonderful outcome, and a return to normal life.
Best regards
Terry, Pauline, and Paul.
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